For 3 days before Halloween, every few hours my facebook status changed to say what costume I was going to wear and why. By popular demand these are the statuses I thought up, which were quite a few more than I actually used.
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Branding
- is dressing up like a Timex cause she takes a licking and keeps ticking
- is dressing up like a Facebook page just so people can comment
- is dressing up like Coke cause she’s the real thing
- is dressing up like American Express, because people don’t leave home without it
- is dressing up as AIG so she can ask for her bailout…
- is dressing up like bread because she’s a Wonder…
- is dressing up like the Energizer bunny cause she just keeps going and going…
- is dressing up as Bud Dry… why ask why?
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Food
- is dressing up like chocolate because who can resist chocolate?
- is dressing up like peanut butter so she can find her jelly
- is dressing up like sugar cause she’s that sweet
- is dressing up like butter cause she’s that smooth
- is dressing up as a peach to prove she’s not nuts…
- is dressing up like peanut butter cause she didn’t want to look cheesy
- is dressing up like a walnut, because she’s nutty
- is dressing up like tomato so people could argue if she’s a fruit or a vegetable
- is dressing up like coffee, so she can be smooth and rich
- is dressing up like salsa because she’s spicy…
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Bad Puns
- isn’t dressing up like a dolphin in case anyone thinks she’s got illegal porpoises… * rimshot *…
- is dressing up as cheese so she can ask “Do you want cheese with that?” when kids whine where’s the chocolate?
- is dressing up as a tiger because she’s not lion about her costume… (read out loud)
- is dressing up as a vampire because she’s not a mummy…
- is dressing up a corpse because it goes with the coughin’ …
- is dressing up as a pyrite… don’t you just love spell checkers…. (pirate, pyrite)
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Candy Hunting
- is dressing up like a thief to steal your Halloween Candy
- is dressing up like a ninja so she can sneak around grabbing candy
- is dressing up like Chuck Norris, because then Halloween candy would come to her…
- is dressing up as the teenager who bangs on the door w/o a costume and asks for candy…
- is dressing up as the IRS so she can tax kids on their candy haul…
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Geek Alert:
- is dressing up like the Spanish Inquisition because nobody expects that
- is dressing up like Captain Kirk because he has a thing for green alien women (for the guys)
- is dressing up like Spock because it’s illogical to be anything else
- is dressing up like a dead parrot… in case anyone needs her for a certain skit…
- is dressing up as Darth Vader, so she can walk up to people and say “I am your father” (really amusing since she’s a she)
- is gluing cinnamon rolls to her ears so she can be Princess Leia…
- is dressing up as 42 so she can answer the ultimate question
- is dressing up as Ford Prefect because she’s a hoopy Frood.
- is dressing up like the Doctor so she can have a sonic screwdriver
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Assorted:
- is dressing up like an icicle because she’s that chill
- is dressing up like an airplane cause she’s just that fly
- is dressing up like dynamite cause she’s a real firecracker
- thought about dressing up like the Nobel Peace Prize, but didn’t want to look easy
- is dressing up like a kid so she can get Halloween candy
- is dressing up like a deck of cards to prove she’s playing with a full deck….
- is dressing up like a deck of cards because she’s a heart clubbing with a spade full of diamonds
- is dressing up like an angel cause she plans on partying like a devil
- is dressing up like an IRS agent because she couldn’t find anything scarier
- is dressing up like a firefighter in case she catches any guys on fire…
- isn’t dressing up, so people can see she is a witch..
- is dressing up like a spider, because they eat their mates… (for a divorced friend)
- is dressing up like snow because she’s cool
- is dressing up like music, cause the rhythm is gonna get ya
- is dressing up like a broken shovel because she used to have a handle on life
- is dressing up like salmon because she likes swimming against the stream
- is dressing up as a dust bunny so she can hide your bed…
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From Others
- is dressing up like butter cause she’s on a roll ~ TY Mike Shippey
- is dressing up like a habanero cause she’s that hot ~ Freddie Franco
- is dressing up like air conditioner because she’s a cool breeze ~ Fred Maestas
- is dressing up as a magnet because she’s so attractive ~ Maggie Miller
- is dressing up like a Mallard because she’s just ducky ~ Maggie Miller
- is dressing up like Fort Knox cause she’s pure Gold ~ Maggie Miller
- is dressing up like a Physics Equation because it’s scarier than the evil clown ~ Stella Todd
- is dressing up as dynamite cause she’s having a blast ~ Paul Hobart
- won’t dress up as a stock certificate because she doesn’t want anyone to sell her short ~ Mike Sweezy
- dressing up as a credit card because she has such high interest rates? ~ Mike Sweezy
- is dressing up as a car because she’s so driven ~ Trapper Sherwood
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