See, last week I was really supposed to start working on outrageous requests. Today is technically not the 7th… but I am trying to catch up on posts and it is easier to make certain they are in the correct date order. I hate to ask outrageous requests… I actually hate to make requests… I’ve been disappointed. I also don’t want to make trouble for anyone. I don’t want to be indebted to someone… and so I am in debt….
(exact opposite of intended) So worried about being in debt with people I know that I am in debt to strangers (the bank). How does that even make sense?
And still I hate to ask.
What if you say no? Not that rejection surprises me. No, unfortunately it’s more of a “Why ask when most likely you’ll say no? Why ask when I will be met with another disappointment? Why ask when most likely you’ll say, “I’d love to …. but…”
What if you get mad?
What if I can’t return the favor?
What if …
What if …
You have some of those same fears as well, right? Perhaps yours are a bit different, maybe you fear rejection. Maybe you think people will think less of you. Maybe you think people will reject you, or view you differently. The problem is, that we are not looking at this appropriately…
If you fall off a horse, you get back on and try again. You fall off, you get back up. You do this with yoga and other exercise. You go from not being very good at it, and not having much success, to getting better and getting more success.
Asking people for help regularly means we are more likely to encounter yes. We are more likely to find people who are willing to help. If we ask for help very seldom, then why does it surprise us when we hear no?
What if they view me poorly? Or get mad? Or hate me? Then the question should be, is this person really my friend? If you are there for them, and when you ask for help they aren’t, chances are good this person isn’t really your friend.
What if I can’t return the favor? Who are we to judge what “fair” or “returning the favor” is? I’m great at WordPress. I’ve had friends spend hours trying to get something to work, and I can fix it in 10 minutes. To me this is “nothing” to them, this is huge. We have all thought something was huge when it was minor to someone else. So who are we to judge?
Stop being afraid to ask.
Get over yourself.
Could you please comment on this post?
Could you also add your idea for an outrageous request on Wil Wheaton meets the Ultimate Blog Challenge?
Please read the next posts… they will each be asking for something.