“Thank you,” said to my friends, for being my friends, for loving me, for accepting me, for being the amazing people they are.
“Thank you,” said to my boyfriend for being a great man with a big heart, who loves me and accepts me and is an amazing person.
“Thank you,” said to the clerk who answers my questions about the sofa.
“Thank you,” said to the wait staff who are polite and concerned about my dining experience.
“Thank you,” said to the wonderful people who’ve hired me to work.
“Thank you,” said to the people with whom I work.
“Thank you,” said to the person who gives of themselves to others, be-it time, money, effort, or self.
Why Do I Thank You?
After I say thank you I often hear, “Why are you thanking me?” “This is my job.” “I’m just being me.” “It wasn’t anything.” “but…”
But I say thank you, because I appreciate what you do.
For years, I had a job I mostly loved. I worked with a couple, the husband appreciated me, the wife called me in for almost weekly sessions to tell me what a screw up I was, how worthless I was, how I couldn’t do anything right.
If I really had been as worthless as she said, I would have been fired… which part of me knew, but week after week, month after month, I started believing her words.
Thank You To Bad Bosses
And one day as the boss berated me, I stopped apologizing for existing. I realized how two faced this conversation was… if I were as horrible as she said, why did she need to tell me? Why did she not fire me? And so I stopped listening to what she said. I suddenly wondered how many other people were called into their bosses’ offices week after week like this. And vowed that I would make someone who does their job well, feel appreciated.
After she was done, I told her “Thank you.” It caught her off guard. I wasn’t thanking her for berating me, or treating me like I was worthless. I was thanking her for waking up to the fact I wasn’t worthless and if I was treated like this, then there were 100s of other people treated as I was. And I would make certain working people who cared about their job, their clients, their customers, felt appreciated.
And while attendance to these weekly sessions didn’t end, I stopped listening and soon after quit.
Unfortunately I repeated the cycle of abusive bosses for a few more times… but it makes me appreciate the clients whom I have now, who genuinely care about me.
I repeated the cycle with friends and boyfriends, and when I decided I’d had enough … I vowed I would appreciate those who cared…
So I say “Thank You”….
So I say “Thank you,” to friends and my boyfriend; because, I want them to know I appreciate their love, their friendship, their respect and I want them to feel appreciated because others may not.
So I say “Thank you,” to the clerk who is helpful, because I’ve talked to staff who couldn’t be bothered. So this clerk needs to appreciated and I appreciate her help.
So I say “Thank you,” to the wait staff, who may just be doing their job, but they are doing it happily, not grudgingly, because they need to know it’s appreciated.
So I say “Thank you,” to the wonderful people who’ve hired me to work, because while it could be considered “just a job,” they trust me to take care of them, and I enjoy what I do, and I appreciate that.
So I say “Thank you,” to the people with whom I work, because I know what it’s like to work with people who don’t appreciate you, and wouldn’t care if you lived or died. And I work with wonderful people whom I can call friends and who do great work, and they need to know that is appreciated.
So I say “Thank you,” to the person who gives of themselves to others, be-it time, money, effort, or self, because while what they do may not have a direct impact on my life… the ripples it creates, changes the world.
But….
And I say thank you so people stop trying to qualify when someone says “thank you.” I am still guilty of this. Donna says, “thank you for …” and I say “but it has this fault” or “but I could have done better…” or “But it’s my job…” or “I’ve got years of experience.”
Truth is… if someone says thank you, and you try to justify what you did, you aren’t accepting gift of gratitude someone is trying to give you. Your answer should be simple, “You’re welcome” or “Glad I could help.” And while we’re on the subject, if someone pays you a compliment, rather than try to explain it away, or justify what you did, accept the compliment with a simple “Thank you.”
Life is Short
There is no guarantee that tomorrow will come for you or me. And what if I miss the opportunity to say “thank you” by holding onto it for just one more day? What if the words of appreciation come at a moment when someone feels totally unappreciated?
What if we all started to appreciate the people in our lives? What if we realized how the little things are often more important than the big, and appreciated those and the giver too? Would lives change? Would the world change? Would there be more love in the world? Appreciation takes so little time, so little effort and yet the impact is big.
And so I thank you for reading this. I’ve been hurt. I don’t want you to hurt. I’ve been unappreciated and I don’t want you to feel unappreciated. And I’m selfish, I *want* more love in the world, and the only way to do that, is reflect it out…
So …. “thank you…”
Live, Laugh, Love,
MJ Schrader
